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CHINA BOX

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China Box by Private is a pretty clean movie. No, I didn’t mean that virtually every single ass in it doesn’t get hammered until it starts dripping mystery fluid. I mean, it looks clean and nice. All the girls except one have nice slot(machine) twats and the film works well. Sure, there’s probably even a plot. But I fast-forward through the plot segments of American pornos so you can bet your hot red love buns that I skip anything with talking in the European titles.

This flick contains a large crew of ladies, several of them real lunchboxes full o’ happy, steamy sexuality. Rest assured there are no females on this tape that you would hesitate to hump vigerously in the midst of a drunken haze. Plenty of brunettes and plenty of shaved, mostly shaved, partially shaved, shorn, artfully shaved and tastefully shaved vaginas. In all you get seven scenes with China Box – some better than others but nothing truly bad. I wish Europeans girls would learn to suck dick – I’m betting the limp hooker on your street has better deep-throat skills than any one of these sluts – but lord, can they take it in the rear adeptly. Clyde thinks these ladies are aliens with auxillary vaginas. Not me. I think they just practice a lot. It’s like basketball.

Audi TT fans should take note: scene 5 finds Petra fucking a Pearl Jam clone on the seats, hood and roof of a silver TT. Just thought you should know. It’s a good scene and a cool car.

The only real downer is in the fourth scene. The dark-haired woman here has some incredibly suspect pimplies on her junk. In fact, her whole pussy looks like it’s ready to run into the forest and die of something infectious. Again, nothing you wouldn’t hump after 10 Millers and a box of Franzia, but it’d be nice to see that shit healed up properly. Also, a couple of the butts do get a little leaky (yellowish ooze – sexy!) but since you’re on the couch with your dick no where near those slopholes, it’s OK.




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