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I don’t know how many cumshots are on this DVD. A lot. 2 hours and 20 minutes of cumshots. Since it’s called “Cumshots” and there are lots of cumshots how can I rate it poorly? It is what it is. You know if you want it or not already. Culled from the Anabolic vaults here are dozens and dozens of cumshots presented back-to-back for your very own pitiful night of entertainment. There’s old footage, there’s new footage, there’s plenty of gooey-gooey glue footage.

There are famous girls like Belladonna, Nikita Denise and Aria to name a few. There are not at all famous girls covered with zits and jizzum. Girls who swallow, girls who spit, girls who wallow in it. There are cumswapping bitches. There are ATM cumshots. There are bukkake-style group cumshot sessions. There’s just a whole dang goddamn lot of cumshots! Wooo-haa!How long do you want me to talk about cumshots? A scene by scene breakdown would be 200 pages long here and even you, oh great Raincoater in the sky, would be bored to tears by the end. Highlights? How about the girl lapping come off a urinal? Or the girl lapping come out of a dogfood bowl labeled “Shithole”? That’s just the start. Some of the cumshots are tame and demure, some are wild and unsure, some are messy and unpure. I could go on all day like Dr. Suess because cumshots bring out the poet in me.Speaking of me, you wouldn’t catch me sitting around watching this. When I see the girls getting glooped on I wonder “Well, what was the fuck like that I didn’t get to see?” If there’s a hot girl getting jizzed on, I instantly regret not seeing her get laid first. All these cumshots are like eating cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, vomiting cake, eating more cake.But, like I said: it delivers what it says it does. It’s cumshots. Amaaaaaazing cuuuuuumshots!

LAND OF THE AMAZONS
One of the guys falls off the cliff and the other is captured by an Amazon. You are following the story so far aren’t ...

PUSSY FOOT’N 6
And that gives me street cred (in some streets at least) and a little bit of knowhow. At least enough to write ...

ASS CRACKIN’ 4
Fuckin' right on. The always delicious Jane Darling is here too, in a crazed, pneumatic DP scene. The other girls - one-named wonders with big ...

BLUELIGHT
Extra attraction includes a great bonus scene with Candy Apple and Nich Taylor who enjoy getting "down on the farm!" This gets a five rating for ...

JADA FOX EXPOSED
Obviously, an ALL Jada clip comp woulda been netter, but this is a still good place to find her, if yer lookin'.