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The best thing about Private’s Fever was the clean, clean, clean vaginas. These must be Private’s top tier chicks, because not all Private girls have genitals you could eat off of. I’m too lazy to put names to the faces for this movie, but the girls’ names are above and if you’re looking for a particular one, rest assured that every girl listed performs well and looks flawless.

Fever is approx. 2 hours, containing 6 sex scenes and a lot o’ intrigue (AKA boring talking scenes).

I’m not sure what this movie was about, but can you blame me? I can’t stand Private’s crummy dubbed in voices and I was just trying to get to the hot twats I knew were ahead.

Private’s token black male pornstar is in this movie. He and Goatee Man fuck most of the chicks. The first scene kicks of the group love with the above mentioned guys and three pretty ladies. Blaow! Everybody’s instantly naked. The girls in this scene remind me of the vampire succubuses (succubi?) in the recent Bram Stoker’s Dracula movie. They pant and mince about wearing expressions of exaggerated pain/pleasure. Ultimately you know that they are completely soulless. But you want them anyway. One complaint: all of the close-ups in Fever are blurry – apparently this was intended to be artsy or imply extreme motion. But, the twats are soso nice.

Goatee Man fucks chicks in the next two scenes. The ladies are kind of Russian looking. Their only defect is that they can’t seem to shake the awful magenta eyeshadow. Is that a chic pornstar thing over in Europa? Who knows. The first girl 69s Goatee Man till he sprays and the second gets her perfect A-hole pounded for a bit. The fourth scene is a happy threesome and inculdes an auburn-haired girl who is hotter than my stove when I’m cooking, uh, stuff. There’s nary a hairy or pimply on the angelic crotches of these cumhoneys. Scene 5: Bulky dude rams shorhair beeyotch in the ass in a garage. And lastly, scene six is the customary blow-out or-O-geee starring four ladies and three hulking meatheads. The final trick: back-to-back DPs for two of the ladies. Way to use them wimmens like jungle gyms!

So. You’ll get your porno fix with this one. If you need more than this, seek consuling.

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