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I guess In-X-Cess’s M.O. is to pick up amateur tapes from wherever and bang ‘em out in low-budget DVD’s like this ‘un, and I actually think that’s as boss as boss can be, cuz if yer like me and end up watching a hunnerd porn flicks a week, than yr get kinda tired watching the same Ecstasy-riddled cockqueens gettin their puckered ass drilled for the 666th time. So, you know, I’m down for a few fresh faces. However, this particular volume mighta been better served as blackmail in a divorce hearing 15 years from now, cuz as it stands, these teens are more tepid than torrid.

Tiny (and I do mean TINY- you could fit this chick in a shoebox and keep her under yer bed, if wanted) teen Tasia looks kinda like a shrimpy Paris Hilton, and even tho her ribs jut outta her chest like they’re trying to break free, she looks more fit than starved. She’s even got a bubble-butt. Half of one, anyway. Tasia has a scene with some big jocky-tattoo guy (Pete) that likes to eat her pussy and stare at the camera with big doeful eyes a lot. He fucks her rather gently in a brick-walled room while a really bad top 40 station blares in the background. She has to jerk the dude off for-fucking-ever to get him to cum, but he finally does. Thank Christ. Bottom line? Dig the chick, ditch the dribbler.

Damnit, Pete’s back in the next scene, but at least this time he’s with the ultra-mega Lauren, a huge-titted blonde bombshell with a generous ass and an eagerness to please. She sucks dick like she’s chewing on tough steak, but since it’s not my dick, I don’t really mind, and what she lacks in finesse, she more than makes up for in nuclear-powered jiggle. Definitely a highlight.

Tasia returns with some other mook named Scott, and since it’s in the same room, on the same bed (same sheets, even), with the same radio station on, it’s suddenly obvious that this is a one-day wonder. Well, alright. There’s worse ways to spend a day, I suppose. Anyway, T&S have a standard fuck n’ suck in several slow, deliberate steps. I think the guys are afraid of breakin’ her in half, or something, cuz they refuse to fuck her hard. C’mon fellas, slap her in the tits, woulda ya? I mean, let’s make a fuckin’ porno flick, ya know?

Uh, anyway. Pete fucks a full-figured hotty by name of Samantha next, and even tho she’s a little awkward in the dirty moves department, she’s that ever elusive SEXY-kinda fat, so its fun just to watch her undulate in feigned rapture while those floppy bowling balls of hers rattle around. Then Tasia’s back. Then there’s this super-hot evil brunette sitting on the purple-stained sheets, lookin’ all bored and hussy-like, and I think something good mughta happened, but the guy she does the scene with start fuckin’ DANCING in his goddamn underwear, and to tell ya the truth, Rancho doesn’t pay me enuff to put up with that kinda abuse.

Basically, what we got here is yr classic missed opportunity. If ypu’ve got a gaggle of 18 year old chicks who are loose and dumb enough to be in yr cheapjack porn flick, don’t fuck them like they’re yr wife, brother. Fuck ‘em like the dirty little tramps that they are. Trust me, I went to college, and that’s how they like it.

Tasia, Samantha, evil brunette girl- you are all cordially invited over to Sleazegrinder HQ, where we will get a buncha paint guns and some farm animals and a ritual sword or two, and REALLY make us a fuckin’ stroke flick. Pete, etc- you cats stay home and keep dancin’ with yrselves, ‘k?

ROOM SERVICE 1
Fuckin' fantastic opener. The usually crazed skinny-ass blonde Crytal Ray is on the menu too- no ass fucking for her today, but she does her ...

DYKES FROM HELL 19
Drew and Stacie are two such hotties and they star in the first scene. I can't tell you which is which, but the VIP ...

CASUAL SEX
"Casual Sex" ....another in the fine line of fuck flicks from Adam & Eve. Opening scene is Shayla La Veaux at laptop, composing a story ...

AMERICAN AMATEURS 2
He moves her into a doggy position and fucks her in the ass. Misty Haze is at work when she walks around the desk and ...

SEYMORE BUTTS’ LIP SERVICE
However, there's not a loser in the bunch. Excellent. Go get it.